Pick-Up Artistry is to dating what diet pills are for weight loss. They don’t work, but they are what the victims are willing to pay for.
People exposing themselves to pick-up artistry (PUA) render themselves completely undateable. Even by their own standards.
How to spot PUA-damage?
It is actually quite easy to spot PUA-damage in a guy – if you know what PUA is. You can see them computing seconds between sentences, make out zones, and your score on a scale to 10 in their little heads. They don’t actually listen to you, and they don’t answer questions, they are merely scanning for PUA-keywords that trigger their learned responses.
And most strikingly, you don’t matter. You could be a mental moth, a public bathroom attendant, or Jehovah’s witness – as long as you are not fat. A PUA-damaged guy cannot grasp that the thing adorning the vagina feels like a person – just like he does.
The telltale sign of a PUA-damaged man: you feel like shit next to him.
He will probably throw an unprovoked insult at you. You can sense his resentment for the rejection he hasn’t even received yet. He sounds mental. So you reject him.
PUA-victims are startlingly alike
20-something PUA-victims look at women as walking vaginas, access to which is a hot commodity to be traded for status and/or cunning manipulation and grandstanding. Breaking the woman carrying the vagina is as good a method to gain access as any.
30-something PUA-victims look at the female race as unfortunate custodians of wombs that must be put to use. They want to use women to incubate and bring up their second coming – but somehow in a way that doesn’t benefit the female, only the child.
They both consider dating as a war based on gender-identity, where complete elimination of the enemy is sadly not possible, since the enemy is grown around the prize and cannot be detached. Hence their schizophrenic approach to all women, even the ones they wouldn’t stick.
And don’t forget, PUA-damage can come via any self-help nonsense or peer advice. And women are not exempt from it either. Once you start slinging the mud and cast people into dumb gender roles and demeaning stereotypes, you will get dirty.
A PUA-victim is per definition a sad story
No, he wasn’t born this way. No one is. He made a conscious effort to ruin himself.
Why are they ridiculous?
1. They buy into this business model
People always pay to hear what they want to hear, but never the painful solution. As I said, like diet pills.
PUA-victims in particular pay for a pseudoscience (with one-digit numbers thrown in for credibility) that treats an entire segment of the population as automatons with calculable outcomes.
They also buy into the catchy notion of collective victimhood, and entitlement to punish the perpetrators. With their own love…
2. They are posing as the coveted bachelor from a 50s dating manual
They are the perfect complements to the gold-diggers and manipulative bitches whose existence they are so aware of. In fact, that’s the only kind of woman they ever notice. They will project that behavior even on women who are not like that.
PUA-victims all want to take revenge for the manipulation other men have allegedly suffered throughout history at the hands of gold-diggers. Gold-diggers no doubt exist but living to put them into their place is as useful for dating as slapping the faces of random men on the street to retaliate for all the domestic abuse women have ever suffered.
3. They are duped into existential and psychological warfare against the very people whose company they crave.
They call it The Game. I would go for Sour Grapes, but as you wish.
The most damaging part of every ideology is the subtext. The thing that is silently presumed before anything is even said. The thing that is not spoken – at least not by the self-respecting ones.
Deniability is key, so PUA supplies that too, but the implied messages of PUA never escapes their attention. It is to defeat. It is entitlement. Their PUA masters allow these boys to feel entitled to punish. “This is about you.”
4. A PUA-victim is per definition not his own man.
Someone, who gave him these ideas is pulling his strings. What could be less attractive than that? His PUA master may be long dead, but the damage is done.
They remind me of the little boy, who heard a jock boasting in the locker room: “I just told this girl to “kneel and love”, and she did.” The little boy vaguely felt that there was something fishy about this advice, but couldn’t put a finger on it. He wasn’t sure if he was after an instant blowjob in the first place, but he knew nothing better to want. The months passed and the information worked in his little head. And then one day he plucked up the courage, convinced himself not to be a pussy, and that he needed to show confidence, and he approached the girl he secretly liked. And told her something along the lines of kneeling and blowjobs… And bitches.
PUA-victims buy into the alarming and false notion of alphas and betas – and they consider themselves betas. Self-assigned betas are dangerous because they need someone below themselves and will push you down if they must. They must.
5. They will attract and create the very women they fear:
Their world view only knows two kinds of women: Weak-minded idiots and dedicated manipulators.
What’s worse, no other kind of woman could tolerate them.
6. They try to get a female by waging war against her entire kind
They are confused as to whether they want a life partner or the greatest number of vaginas around their dicks in the shortest period of time. They chase the first by the methods optimised for the second. Which is about as good as trying to hunt for a pet with a shotgun.
7. Double standards
They wouldn’t date themselves because they want a partner, who doesn’t play games. But they reserve the right to manipulate unilaterally.
They are also loud about passive-aggression and psychological abuse by women in a relationship – and they should know, because they are taking courses in both.
8. Even their PUA masters think that they’re stupid.
PUA-victims actually believe there is such thing as a guy who can get all the women in a bar – and that it’s a desirable state to be. They have no standards as to what they are willing to fuck – even though they claim to do so. Their numbers’ game doesn’t allow them to be picky.
Dear boys, your PUA masters and their paid entourage (or Photoshopped lady-herd from Vegas-themed stock photos) think you are stupid and pathetic. They wouldn’t dare to peddle this to intelligent people.
9. They have levels…
… and they rate women like they could afford.
10. They are dumb
Their babble is just as esoteric and feel-goody as women’s forums that hurt my eyes. This is the same intellectual laziness, but with more angular type fonts and against a dark background – because macho. Silly males spread their inspirational quotes over images of boobs, not sunsets, but they are still silly.
Sometimes, they spread insults on women on their boob-themed memes. You can guess what made them do that.
11. Someone, who dedicates his time to gain “access to sex” regards others as slaves to their “base instincts”
And he attacks you if you call him out on it.
12. They are damaged beyond repair
When they say women are brainwashed, they know what they are talking about. They know brainwashing firsthand. It is tempting to ease into the comforting story PUA offers, but it becomes increasingly difficult to extricate themselves from it.
But make no mistake, ladies, you have no right to change them. (Not that it’s possible or worth it.) And just like a PUA-victim frantically oscillates between being himself and what-would-a-man-do (and doesn’t really have that ‘himself’ fully developed) – so do you.
This post is not about guys, who learn PUA because they want to punish women. This is to guys, who long for a partner, and mistakenly believe that learning PUA can’t hurt their chances. It can.
Read Next: The PUA business model
On the featured image Jason Statham (icon of the masculinity-cult) demonstrates how to pick-up women on Qi Shu in Transporter (2002).