Gratitude Is Another Word “Stockholm Syndrome”

The best marriage advice you will ever get is also the most dubious.
Continue reading “Gratitude Is Another Word “Stockholm Syndrome””


Clockwork Humans

There are people who used to be present when they were young. Maybe they even used to be your friends. But now they are gone, disappeared, missing. They are physically there but they are running The Program. I call them washing machine people – or clockwork humans.

They keep committing the suicide of the soul and keep pushing it onto you. Here is why.   Continue reading “Clockwork Humans”

Relationship roles, life scripts are the death of love


– So you want to play Hamlet?

– Yes, but not with the unstable personality, I don’t like that. Oh, and not Danish. And I disapprove of suicide so I won’t do it. And the lines, I’ll need new lines, these are odd and frankly, too long. And I have issues with Shakespeare so I prefer it to be someone else’s play.

– So why do you still want to play Hamlet?

– Because everyone wants to do it, and so do I. And I like the stage and I want to be seen. And I want to tell everyone that I did it.

Continue reading “Relationship roles, life scripts are the death of love”

Jealousy is not part of love – Lessons from polyamory #3


We should stop humble-bragging about being jealous. We tend to treat it as some kind of forgivable virtue. We went as far as to confuse it with love itself. How much further can we lower the bar? Continue reading “Jealousy is not part of love – Lessons from polyamory #3”

What is love? And what it isn’t


In monogamy people can conveniently blend friendship, respect, admiration, lust, legal and financial co-dependence, passion, ownership and sometimes even actual love – under the word ‘love’. They can do it because there is no social need to distinguish. Continue reading “What is love? And what it isn’t”

Lessons to learn from polyamory #1

Polyamory to monogamous relationships is like orgy is to sex. It may be for you, or not at all. You may or may not be willing to try. But it requires the deconstruction of the activity and the reassembling of the parts. It requires to know yourself in a way that you should do in a monogamous relationship too.

Monogamous couples could learn a few tricks from polyamory.  Continue reading “Lessons to learn from polyamory #1”